Today my hubby and I are married for 13 years. It has been a joint path with ups and downs, like in any other relationship, hence, like life itself. We aren’t doing anything special today to celebrate our anniversary, ’cause my rock starts at his new function tomorrow and wants to tie-up some loose ends of his former function. We made the decision together, about 3,5 years ago, to move to Germany so my soulmate could focus more at his job and didn’t have to travel as much any longer, as he had to do before. It also means, occasionally, for my spouse to invest extra time.
That is, to me, what a good relationship is about; support each other and give each other space to grow personally, within the relation. Of course, you have to grow together alongside also and don’t forget to say ‘I love you’ every now and then.
A few weeks ago, I saw an item on television, in which a reporter asked people, if they say ‘I love you’ a lot. Not only to their significant other, but also to a family member or a friend. Although it didn’t surprise me, ‘we’ don’t say those words a lot. I thought about that some more, since (if you have been following me regularly, you already know this) acknowledgement is very important to me. It is so easy to slip into taking each other for granted and after a while, it might even start to feel a bit uncomfortable to say, out of the blue and for no special reason, that you love the other person. And yes, I also feel, saying those words without actions to support those words is just weird.
I do believe however, there are different levels of love. I love my husbands and dogs, my family, my friends and even you, dear readers. I like to believe my heart is big enough for you all, unfortunately at the same time, I won’t be able to invest in everyone equally. If I love my husband more than, for instance, our dogs is for me a difficult question to answer. Fortunately, my rock understands this and won’t even ask me to choose. When it comes down to spending time with you here in the Internet-world, the decision is made very easily; my Dreampack comes first. Does that mean, I love others less? When you feel the need to put a number to it, then I guess, yes, probably. To me the strength of my love isn’t different, the amount I (can) give, which equals the time I have, is and therefore has to be different.
Someone who gives you space to be yourself, to grow at your own pace and is not jealous the moment you pay another beautiful soul a bit more attention, because that person (or animal) needs it. Not feeling the need to weigh it at a scale, no matter the type of relationship.
That, to me, is what love is about.
There is that saying “actions speak louder than words”, but don’t forget to just say it too:
I love you.