Holy Moly… I just realized it’s been four weeks since I last published a post here @ my virtual home. Time flies when having fun and being busy. Unfortunately, that was not the case for me…
So what happened?
Two weeks ago, we had to say goodbye to a loved one who passed. It was his own decision to no longer proceed with medical treatment and therefore it was not out of the blue. However, losing a Beautiful Soul close to you is always a sad experience. My husband and I are very down to earth regarding death, being it part of the cycle of life, and although we do grieve, we are ok.
Overall, that was where my attention had to go, naturally.
Besides supporting my husband during the planning for the farewell ceremony and taking care of all those tasks that goes with losing a very close beloved one, I also found myself reflecting about my own life again. About the remaining time I get to spend here on our wonderful globe, how I would like to spend that precious time, with whom, etc. Because normally, you’ll never know the duration of that time.
The death of beloved ones, humans or furry friends, also always brings up the past. Of course, fun and warm memories, but in my case, also painful ones. Past events I wished some other beloved ones had attended. Choices made, actions taken, which have hurt my soul. This time, however, I felt a shift. I was no longer frustrated, angry, about the pain inflicted upon me.
I realized; I no longer want to be the cause of pain, regardless if I may have every right to be. Throwing the past in someone’s face over and over does not resolve anything. Letting go of that past is the healthier choice.
Thinking of myself as being a compassionate person, doing my best to put myself in another person’s shoes. Hurt people hurt people, and seeking understanding instead of basing decisions on assumptions is a personal ongoing challenge. At the same time, I also have a limit of what I can take on. This thought entered my mind yesterday:
Compassion doesn't mean absorbing everything
Letting go of loved ones, due to whatever reason, will in the end always be a sad experience. Because letting go, does not always mean you love a person less. The Beautiful Soul who had to leave us two weeks ago, already taught me an important lesson once and now, indirectly, he gifted me another one.
I will be forever grateful for that. May he rest in peace.