All the coaching and counseling techniques in the world couldn’t prevent me from being triggered. It doesn’t happen as much these days compared to several years ago, however, yep, yesterday I totally lost my cool…
From flat to upside down
Our natural core value integrity is only put to use, when it is beneficial on an individual level. Or so it seems. We rather make another wrong, or assume the worst, than to look into the mirror and examine our own behavior. The consciousness we developed as a species, and what makes us unique on this round ball, has lead to a misguided belief that it makes us human beings superior to everything else that lives.
Centuries ago, we learned that the earth is not flat, but a beautiful round ball. That shifted a lot of belief systems, was the start of a bunch of new theories and helped to evolve our species. Somehow, however, it appears that there are people who now believe in an upside down world.
Opinions, perspectives, assumptions
Of course, we all have the right to our own opinions, and it’s a given that we perceive our world and all happening upon it differently. What we tend to forget, is that we are not entitled to get agreement. I am not an exception to this. I catch myself from time to time expecting everyone to think exactly like me. Assuming that my fellow human neighbors believe in the same values as I do.
In my opinion, we are part of nature and that unique consciousness doesn’t place us above anything. I still find it unbelievable, that the colour of our skin, or the choice of partner is an excuse to harm another human being. In addition, although we are animals (and thus understandable, we have that instinct of survival of the fittest) our consciousness and core value should help distance ourselves from senseless violence.
As human beings, just like other animals, we always will be triggered by something. We react to the change of seasons, the abundance or lack of food and various other matters which affect our being. Especially when we sense our existence is threatened, we will instinctively respond. Thanks to the way we did evolve, we have access to another tool and no longer have to be literally violent to defend our choice of lifestyle.
That’s why I usually advocate using words to make your point. As long as they are not intentionally harmful, the language we developed is a perfect tool to talk about our different opinions and perspectives. Instead of assuming the worst, we can ask for clarification about behavior and beliefs. We have the ability to choose how to respond and thus no longer to react thoughtlessly.
Yesterday I lost my cool
We are unique in our kind. Fortunately, because we do have the knowledge to treat our shared ball with respect. To use ancient wisdom and develop new ways to preserve the earth we all live upon, including for the non-human. We possess a consciousness and core value to remind ourselves we are part of nature, not superior to it.
At the same time, because we are ultimately still animals, we have a right to protect our own. As also our boundaries, both literally and metaphorically. That natural instinct to protect triggered me yesterday. I forgot all about the lessons learned, our core value, personal values, etc. and my emotions got the better of me.
Some will argue that that is what makes us human; being perfect in our imperfections. Be that as it may, it does not mean it is good practice. Turn into a growling mamma bear, to put it nicely, and losing sight of my communication skills is not my preferred way to go through life.
However, and hopefully a bit more civilized next time: cross my boundaries, attack my beloved ones, try to make me believe again our world is flat… I will lose my cool ; -)